Why Me?

So many years spent getting knocked down.
Then turning around & picking myself back up.
Beaten black, bloody, & purple.
Bruised from head to toe.
Tears stream down my face,
While I still stand back up and ask "Is that all you got?!"
Only to get knocked back down.
No use in running away they'll find you anyway.
Year after year wishing the last blow would just end my life.
Praying for God to take me home.
Never was a prayer answered.
Apparently cuz I'm still here.

They say he never gives you more then you can handle.
Well damn he must have faith in my strength for all the hell I've been through.
So tired of the pain and tears.
Just wanna be safe; feel safe.
Have arms that hold me;
Not knock me to the ground.
Words that are kind;
Not words that try so damn hard to tear me down.

I'll never understand why me?
A good woman; with a caring heart.
I must of committed some horrible crime in a past life.
To have to live the life I have lived.
I just keep asking why me?!
Do I not deserve to be loved?
Do I not deserve to feel safe?
Once upon a time I must of never been right.
To have lived day in & out in fear for my own life.

Looking for love in all the wrong places.
Never understanding why they never loved me.
Just want arms that protect me,
Not abuse me.
Lips that kiss & words that heal my broken heart.
I've only dealt with words that slice thru me like a newly sharpened knife.
I'll never understand why me?!
Just looking to finally relax & be safe.
To be able to stop looking behind my back.
Stop with the cold sweats & sleepless nights of being beaten into a pulp.
Is it to much to want to be loved & feel safe in the arms of a man who's only crime is loving me unconditionally?
Just lookin for love, safety, happiness & a life long kind of love.
There's nothing I wouldn't sacrifice for a love like that.
True, real, one in 6 billion kind of love.

~Sparrow

All poetry and lyrics written and owned by Kelli Irene "Sparrow" Ramirez and federally protected under the United States Copyright Act © 1998-2013